I had a revelation the other day while holding the legs of a chair that Scarlett was rocking on, saving her from the doom that she didn’t even know she was creating for herself. I realized this is what we do as parents. This is love. It is a love that doesn’t take any work, or thought. I just naturally hold the bottom of the chair, knowing that if I don’t no one else will. If I don’t she will fall and I would sit for 20 minutes kissing away her tiny tears. Although she might learn from that one mistake, chances are she will try it again as soon as the memory of the fall fades away.
Now that Scarlett is walking I spend my day moving obstacles that might cause her to trip before she even knows that they are there. I trail her around the park, just waiting for her to fall on the stairs or flip the wrong way on the slide. When she needs me I will be there, and when she doesn't I am slightly disappointed. I am her mom, she will always need me, right?
Yesterday she was a little blob of a person barely able to turn onto her own stomach, today she is running, scraping her knees, and dancing in the car. Every day there is less and less need. She is an explorer. As much as I want to save her from every impending doom, she is starting to make decisions.
But for now I will settle for silently holding the bottom of her chair or pulling the loose cord in hallway tight as she stumbles by. I will cherish her cries of "mama" in the morning, her hugs, her smiles and her laughter. I'm just going to love, a love that doesn't take any work or thought. This is a parents love.
